My new journal background:



My new album on repeat:

The One.



I Am.

This corset is for a very special client. I'm not going to post details until things are more finalized, but this could potentially be a huge, huge break for me. Fingers crossed! Needless to say, it's been a positive end to what has been an extraordinarily dismal year. Here's to 2010 and new opportunities!




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So if you remember back in the day I was seriously contemplating dreading up my hair. I can't say I'm still not completely opposed on the idea, but I've decided to at least wait until I give modeling a good solid effort. If that doesn't happen then I'm dreading it up shortly afterwards.

In the meantime a month or two ago I had a friend start a dread in my hair. It's starting to get super solid and look beautiful. I love how perfect the texture of my hair is for dreads. The little secret on my dread progression is the fact that only half of it is actually attached to my head. Intrigued? You should be.

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Getting together my 2009 picture post so get pumped! This is one of my favorite moments of the year.

So this is how it is: the innocent suffer, the guilty go free, and truth and fiction are pretty much interchangeable. There is neither a Santa Claus nor an Easter Bunny and there are there are no angels watching over us. Things just happen for no reason and nothing makes any sense.

I thought I would start this off with a little bit of a dream analysis, but it turns out that you can get any dream to mean anything, depending on what website you use. I no longer believe in the meaning of dreams, it is just the brain rebooting and we add meaning to the dreams to somehow make sense of things. Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, Jesus, the kindness of strangers, and now dreams. The list just keeps growing, I am more likely to believe in fortune cookies at this point. At least they possess the randomness that represents actual life and do not try to attach meaning to things that have no meaning.

Anyhow, on to the unanalyzed dream.

The other night, I had a dream that I committed suicide. Now remember, this is me. I daydreamed about suicide for years and lest we forget the overdue notice the city library sent me when I was in high school for "The Encyclopedia of Modern Murder." I was/am a morbid sort of guy. I fall in fast friends with anyone who thinks "American Psycho" is more of a manual than a novel and have fond memories of a former boss relating stories of how he used to work with Ted Bundy and even went to the park with him a few times for ice cream (he had vanilla, I know, right?!).

(That reminds me of how I went to the library recently to check out if "The Encyclopedia of Modern Murder" was still available. It was, but was in the deep reserve stacks or something. We have this new beautiful library that is amazing to look at, but almost impossible to use. If you're on the ninth floor and there is a fire? Do you run down the cork-screw floors or do you cram into that tiny stairwell? I guess you could break a window and slide down the side of it? Anyhow, they were gone for twenty minutes after I put in my request for the book and I began to wonder if I was being profiled or something. I left. I just wanted a quick trip down memory lane. Moors murders, anyone?)

In the dream, there was a great amount of preparation before the suicide. I donated all my clothes and shoes to various charities, I cleaned out my kitchen and bathroom of everything. I burned all my physical journals and deleted all my virtual ones. I closed accounts, erased profiles, and had all my mail forwarded to a non-existent address so it would get dead-lettered. I dropped my phone and computer into a sink full of water and threw everything away until all that was left was dishes and books (I have a lot of both). Then, I got on a ferry and jumped off the back of it when it was in mid-passage.

I woke up very impressed with my organizational skills.

Obviously, all of this is written with the understanding that I am not suicidal. Even if I was, I could not actually do it, I know what it is like to be left behind. It sucks and no amount of time and organization could answer all the questions people have after a suicide. If I could do it and people would just think, "Oh, totally," then there should be some concern.

Again, not committing suicide, just had a random dream about organizing one.

Also, no need to write back with attempts of making me believe in the Tooth Fairy, et al. I'm good. My lack of belief in the Tooth Fairy should not in any way dilute your belief. Put "The Power of Myth" on your Netflix queue or read the book version.

It is too schizophrenic to now throw in a Holiday Gift Guide? Is it? Good.

1. Everyone. Anything from Muji. Your friends/family will love it and chances are they do not have it already: http://www.muji.us/

2. Traveler. Anything from Flight 001. Retro passport covers, crazy gadgets, overly-designed neck pillows: http://www.flight001.com/

3. Humans. We need to drink water and we like to carry the water with us. Stainless steel water bottles from anywhere, really. They have cool ones at Abitare: http://www.abitareshop.com/

4. Him. Pajamas and slippers. You think he won't wear them, but he will. Available at your finer gas stations on up, pick a price point that is realistic to you.

5. Siblings. Vintage Posters. Eurythmics "Touch" or go kitchy with a Nagel. Have them relive their high school bedroom, but now framed, so it's, like, art and stuff: http://postermuseum.com/

6. Her. It always is and always will be jewelry, dumbass.

7. Me. I'm good, thanks.

I am clearly bored. This is what I just made to have made into a tshirt:



Ladies and Gentlemen, Jackie Beat:

Eat This Tuber for Smoother Skin - Health Tip - realage.com

No one wants to be a potato face. Unless you're talking about sweet potatoes.

Turns out that the beta carotene in sweet potatoes helps combat rough, scaly winter skin. And the nutrient may protect against UV damage, too. But you need to eat your sweet potato mash, not apply it. Studies showed benefits working from the inside out.

Yukon Gold and Sweet Potato Mash
Seems beta carotene helps balance pH and encourages skin cell turnover -- both of which can mean smoother, softer skin. Sweet potatoes are also rich in vitamin C, another skin-friendly nutrient that can combat aging and dryness. Here's a hot and creamy way to enjoy your sweet potatoes: Yukon Gold and Sweet Potato Mash.

More Ways to Look Younger
Want more tips on how to get beautiful skin? RealAge skin expert Amy Wechsler, MD, recommends these three steps:

Practice deep breathing. Stress is a real skin zapper. Here's how to do it.
Sleep better. Sleep is free cosmetic medicine. Watch this video for more reasons why you shouldn't skimp on sleep.
Skip the sugar and salt. Bad for your skin and your waistline. Find out which has more salt -- bread or potato chips.

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